As an aunty, it is almost a rite of passage to have several little fails along the way when this new human you love so much but know so little about ends under your supervision. They don’t come with a manual, you can’t exactly google the problem (but texting mum or dad often helps solve the mystery), and you do your very best to make sure everyone makes it through your date with a smile.
Over my years as an aunty I have had a few spectacular fails, which I think lots of aunties can relate to! Fortunately, all have been minor in actual consequence, some requiring a change of clothes, and mostly ridiculously funny.
Here are my top 5 Aunty Fails that happen to almost everyone, but you can read ahead of time and be prepared!
When dealing with bodily fluids you need to be prepared. Have everything you need within arms reach, including an endless supply of baby wipes and you should be fine. But remember to be quick. Little ones like to wee when they get a little bit of cool air down there so don’t mess around. Because if you do, the end result is normally a shower of some kind!
Aunty Fail # 2 – You Didn’t Follow The Instructions
Lots of parents like to keep their babes on a schedule. They sleep, eat, play, repeat until about 12 months and then things relax a little and life isn’t so focused on the routine. But if a parent requests you do something at a certain time, do it to the second. Chances are your little one will be anticipating whats next, and if you don’t give it to them you may end up with a crying baby for a while. Or a crying parenting trying to put a crying baby to sleep at midnight because they napped at 5 pm.
Aunty Fail # 3 – You Thought You Were Watching
Toddlers are notorious for doing things they shouldn’t (hello painting their bedroom in nappy cream, or worse) so now is the time to grow eyes in the back of your head. That 5 second check of your phone could result in a fridge invasion or a bookcase climb. Neither are something you want a toddler to be involved in!
Aunty Fail # 4 – You Thought You Had Them, And Didn’t
Relying on a small child to have any involvement in keeping themselves in a particular spot, out of harm’s way, is often a recipe for disaster. Leaving them to hold onto the handrail on the balancing pole at the park won’t end well until they are about four, and any kind of swinging game or a dizzy wizzy must be done with a full adult grip. If not you may end up accidentally swinging the child by one arm in a car park. I have done this one and I promise you it’s only a fail you do once!
Aunty Fail # 5 – You Bought The Licenced Toy
This one is a true rookie error, and while it may make the little one happy, chances are the parents will hate it, particularly if it’s clothing. Kids will obsess over the one item and want it constantly, so you may have just introduced a years worth of bad family photos while you favourite little lady grows out of that Frozen t-shirt. Go with a classic toy or even a gorgeous non-branded outfit, and your gift giving skills will earn some true brownie points with everyone!
The thing to remember is no one chooses to become an aunty. We actually get no say in this process or timing, but I promise you it will be one of the most amazing experiences of your life. I honestly never knew how much I could love a little human until I became an aunty (before my cherubs were born) and although I had a few Aunty Fails along the way, my nephews have grown into gorgeous kids that I love just like they are my own.
Being an aunty is fun, messy, scary, challenging, enlightening and most of all amazing. And I wouldn’t change it for the world.
Love Gwen xx
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